II. My mom and dad keep accusing me of calling 900 numbers. Why call them when I have porn and Chris who calls and fills my phone sex void. Seriously, it was so funny how my dad asked me. I was making and sandwich and he walks into the kitchen all nervous and goes...
"Uhm... have you been calling 900 numbers?"
Lindsey: "Uh. No. Why?"
Dad: "Well, someone has. I got the phone bill and it has two 900 numbers on it. I asked Mandy and she said she didn't."
Lindsey: "Nice to know. I'm never home to call 900 numbers, but thanks."
III. Chris is all crazy and sends me like ten texts a day. "Where are you?" "Where you been?" I finally messaged him back yesterday at work with, "Around." Haha. And then I didn't talk to him again, well until he called last night. I rambled for thirty minutes then he started in with the dirty talk, I wasn't feeling it since I'd masturbated right before he called, and after I woke up and before work, but I played along. He thought I was gettin down and dirty, but little does he know I was reading The Virgin Suicides and chainsmoking.
I got bored with it and said "Wow that was good. I'm sweaty, I'm going to go take a shower now. Night!"
I'm my own hero.
IV. I should be public assitance any time soon. I have $28.05 in the bank right now. Thank god I get paid tomorrow, but I'm just going to blow my check on pot, a new smoking device, and booze.
V. I have the next two days off and it's depressing because I have no plans. I've got no drugs, my love is in Florida, and I'm poor.
WOE IS ME!
I'm going to clean out my beat-ass car and go drive around and pick up some fun.